our trip to ct: round three...

we really had the best time.

thank you mom (granne) for our adventures.  love you.

and the best present of all from the trip? 

a tooth! yup. first one :) i cried. yes, i cried.

oh, being a parent...

our trip to ct: round two...

it was windy! and she loves to be swung around these days.

hence, the last pic.

and no, i don't usually snap 100 photos in a two hour span of myself and my daughter. this trip was the exception.

i mean, who wouldn't want endless photos of that kissable face? yup, thats what i thought.

think we are done? nope, check back for part three.

oh, and miss part one? don't fret, you can backtrack here.

our trip to ct: round one...

lillian adored the beach. 

she ate enough sand to start a beach here in atlanta.

we laughed and smiled at her fascination with the sand, birds and sea.

such sweet innocence.  

thank you. i needed that.

it is amazing to me how things just come into my life. whether it be a moment, or a day, sometimes i have to press pause and appreciate how amazing life is. i have a tendency to get existential in my thinking, so bear with me. this one has a point i swear.

as those of you who read this regularly, or those of you who know me in real life, i have been having a bit of a rough go latley.  feeling really disconnected from my core, what makes me tick as an individual. this move to atlanta has rocked me to the core, not because things are bad, but because i had something really good in nashville, something that will never be paralled. things just really came together there, with me opening a new business. i was an over-energetic newly wed, high on my new adventure in tennessee (because i can promise you i never thought i would see my face on a tennesee license.). hank was starting his mba, i was overjoyed with excitment for him (see honey, i think your mba was the best thing you could have done for yourself and us *wink*). ok, i am going somewhere with this...yes! we were prime for meeting people, getting to know the neighborhood and finding roots in this new and exciting place called nashville.

and nashville opened its arms, oh did it ever. within weeks i was calling it home. and not just because we had purchased our very first actual house there, but because i felt it. inside and out. all around me was home.

and to me, home is so important. home is where my family is, and now that hank and i were our own family, something about moving to a brand new place also made it feel like we have each other, now and forever and this is it.

as it came time for hank to complete his mba, it became clearer and clearer to us that unfortunatly (for both of us as hank shares my deep love for nashville) the opportunities that he had worked so hard for were not in nashville. i gave him my 100% support from the beginning that we would see this mba through to where ever his dream job brought us.

so here we are, in atlanta.

now, i don't take any of my decisions back. i am a firm believer that we all have choices in life, each moment of every day is a choice and i conciously, deliberatly and willingly made the choice to pack up my family, sell our first home, say "see you soon" to our friends and move to atlanta.

and that is just what i did.

i moved through the motions. i followed through on my promise to my husband to support him, on my choice to move.

easy said, right? i did it. i powered through the packing, the terrible buyers we had that currently now own our home (::chills::) and then unpacked and re-organized our new rental. as the pictures show that i posted, i wasted no time trying to make atlanta feel like home. but, right now it really just feels like a house. a place our furniture resides (in a lovely way if i do say so myself). i love our house, it is cozy and perfect for us right now. but, it isn't home. no amount of running around, decorating or organizing can make it home.

so, now the real work begins. and that is scary. as i said to my mom yesterday, i feel like i am shopping for friends. walking the streets with lillian hoping i can run into someone that will help me feel like me, want to talk about hgtv, kim and kris's wedding and all the things inbetween. she doesn't have to be a mom, or be married, i am just longing for someone to kick start my connection to this place called atlanta.

i know she is out there.

so, moral of this long story is, this is where my mind has been. trying to figure out ways to get connected to atlanta so that i have the energy and drive to get re-aquanted with me. practicing yoga (both on and off my mat), drinking wine with people (i have been doing a fair amount of solo-wine drinking...) and speaking adult language. because, well, lillian and i speak in screeches.

then this happened.

i was on the plane to see my mom yesterday. i got up to go to the bathroom to change lillian's diaper. i was waiting in line when a woman tapped my leg. i look down at this beautiful woman holding her belly and she says, "do you blog?".

um, yes, yes i do.

"i read your blog!"

really?! (::insert shocked face here::)

"i knew i recognized you and lillian!"

and in that moment, a wave of something pretty amazing came over me. because i realized i am connected somewhere. i have friends, not necessarily in atlanta, but all over. people who read my words, others who love me dearly and this hap-hazard meeting really brought that forward for me in a moment when i needed it so much.

so, cary (sp?), if you are reading this- thank you. thank you for being bold enough to say hello. thank you for saying you appreciate me in a time when i need it so, even though i am not sure you knew it.

you are going to be an amazing mother.

ah-ha moment

there is nothing like the feeling of pouring a glass of wine after a busy and successful day, knowing that lillian is sleeping happily in her crib.

this is the moment for me. the ah-ha moment of realizing i am a mother.

these days, to be honest, i am struggling. struggling to find the space for me, where i get to be molly and a mom, not just a mom. time will bring this, i know, but for now i will savor my moment and my happy, silly, ever-growing baby. she keeps me going, now and forever.

making a house a home.

i really love a challenge. and i really love home design.

this new house allowed me to enjoy both at the same time.

it is a small little bungalow, with no closets. and when i say no closets, i mean it. so, my mom and i went to work and here is the result.  a few more things to be added, but i am happy.

thank you mom SO much. i would not have a home, but just a house, were it not for you.

 we added some classic rockers to the front porch. star yet to be hung on the brick.

 a fun metal cage houses a happy plant to welcome you into the front door.

 my personal favorite- lillian's nursery. fun, eclectic and happy. oh and a touch girly :)

 our master bedroom. pictures have now been hung, surrounding us in our favorite memories.

 each room except the master is adorned with a fireplace- i love them. playing with the designs of the mantels was a blast. and something i can always change to freshen the room. this one is in the dining room, the first room that welcomes you into our home.

guest bedroom. my mom came up with the idea of the frames across the wall. i love the effect. the cottage feel of the bed is grounded by the frames. the rug brings in a fun touch.

 guest bedroom fire place. love my buddha :)

dining room. elegant, eclectic, yet cozy.

 our open kitchen. looks onto the back screened in porch and the living room. i love how open and spacious it is. notice the dog over the door? :)

 living room/kitchen. love how they flow together.

the living room. i love the built ins. the house came with so much character!

 view from living room. dining room and front door all the way to the right, nursery door visable and master bedroom all the way to the left. kitchen to the left as well. confused yet?

 backyard. two level deck off screened in porch. wish i had a before picture so you could see the transformation! oh well :)

the dogs seem at home. love this pic.

so there you have it. as promised, that is our home. hope you enjoyed it. we sure do :)

lets go forward, shall we?

having not posted for awhile has actually really stressed me out. 

i kept avoiding my computer knowing that if i typed through my life these past two weeks, some pretty tough feelings would come back up and i would be forced to relive them.

so, since this is my little chunk of the internet, i chose not too! ah, how fun is that. yup, folks, we are moving foward!

hank and i are settling in (photos of our abode from the inside to come..) and had a really amazing weekend, free to do what we wanted to. to adventure into a new place we now call home.

 we hit up the park down the street.

 took a hike and did some skinny dipping in the creek...well lillian did :)

 annie joined in on the skinny dipping...

 picnic post hike. lounging after some yummy homemade lunch.

 crawling backwards and loving on her four legged sisters.

park round 2. this time we tackled the slides.

so, things really are going well so far. i love our home, it is so cozy and comfy. i love our neighborhood- lots to walk to, park close by and an eclectic mix of people all around. 

the weeks are hard when hank leaves, i am not going to lie. but i still don't have the desire to return to work. i still am so fulfilled in my role as lillian's mom, so fulfilled and so blessed to have this opportunity right now. 

goals this week? 

1. find a mother's day out program.

2. connect to yoga studios in my neighborhood (ie across the street and around the corner, literally.)

3. take yoga. for me.

and adventure. the aquarium? new park? picnic? so much to explore.

feels good to be back. and moving forward :)

iPhone fun.

life with my new iPhone.